Free Cold Calling Scripts Advice: "Make them laugh!"

by Mike Altman
(Overland Park, KS)

Far too many salespeople get their "feathers ruffled" when the prospect doesn't want to talk to them. We take our prospects' clipped responses as a personal affront.

As you get into cold call selling, know this - you have it in you to unruffle your own feathers.

Cold calls are an unexpected - not necessarily unwanted - intrusion in the day of our prospects. You can break the ice and set an upbeat tone by using some funny or whacky opening line to introduce yourself or your company.

Humor catches your prospects off guard and sets you apart from all of the competing cold calls that your prospects receive.

Keep in mind, your opener doesn't always have to be about business!

At my company I require all of the reps to use statements like these. Use these examples to get you started finding funny lines that work for you:

"I'm looking for the guy at your company that keeps all of you employed!"

When talking to the DM:

"I am selling rabbit powered scooters... how many can I put you down for?"

"Your receptionist said that you are the person in charge of golf, is that true?"

"Someone told me you make decisions on the weather at your company, is that right?"

Always, follow up with "just kidding" and immediately lead into your value proposition.

WARNING: The biggest problem is that most salespeople are afraid to do these type of things. The first time a prospect yells or hangs up they give up.

Here's strong incentive to commit to using humor to blast through any fears ...

"Make them laugh and you can make them buy!"